


Say It

by Is_sa



Category: Les Misérables - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, Apollo!!, Confessions, First Kiss, Fluff, I love the whole apollo thing so much, M/M, a lil bit angsty but fluff in the end!!, just pressuring, mentions of shitty parents, not like abusive tho
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-02
Updated: 2019-06-02
Packaged: 2020-04-06 10:09:34
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,325
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19060519
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Is_sa/pseuds/Is_sa
Summary: Enjolras tries to get a confession out of Grantaire. Grantaire ends up getting one out of Enjolras without even trying.based on a prompt from stereokink on tumblr!





	Say It

“SAY IT!” he shouted from halfway down the block. “SAY IT!” Not angry, just… pleading.  
I couldn’t.. I.. There was no way. He was right there, and I was right here, and I knew the exact words I would say. 

“You’re right. You’re always right. I’m in love with you, Enjolras. I’m sorry,” I would say. “I knew it,” he would say. “I fucking knew it. You should've told me before, Grantaire,” he’d say. “Why didn’t you tell me before?”  
“Why would I have?”  
“Because I’m your friend! Because… Well I guess I just wish you did.”  
“Enjolras, you have never been in love with anything but your studies. I have been in love before. I’ve told him right away before. It… didn’t turn out. What would you have even said?” I’d sigh, still not able to look him in the eye. I’m not sure what he’d say next. I’m not sure he would say anything at all. 

Enjolras was still yelling. Thank god it wasn’t too loud, but I still think some of the people in the dorms near us were waking up.   
I couldn’t say it. I couldn’t bring myself to.   
He was getting tired, I could tell. He stopped yelling. He took a deep breath, took a step towards me, sighed, and simply asked: “Grantaire, what are you so afraid of?”  
Well, that was a loaded question.   
“What am I afraid of? Well, loads of things. Mainly rejection. Humiliation. Every encounter we have from now on being awkward as hell. I’ll never be able to face you again, Enj, and all my friends are also your friends. That sounds stupid, but every time I’d see them, I’d think of you,” I sighed.   
He was silent. I didn’t know what his expression was. I didn’t want to look at him. I couldn’t.   
“Grantaire, I..” he started. “I think it’d be best if you didn’t talk. I can make it the rest of the way to my dorm on my own. Thanks,” I interrupted, walking swiftly past him towards my hall a couple blocks down. It was dark, sure, but I knew my way around.   
“Grantaire wait.”  
I don’t know why, but I paused. I didn’t say anything.   
“Let me say one thing, please. You don’t have to talk to me after that if you don’t want to.”  
I was still silent. I didn’t know if I wanted to hear what he had to say, but he took it as a yes.   
“Look… I’m sorry for pressuring you into telling me. I just.. I’m gonna start with something else, actually.   
“Grantaire, I’m sorry I’m always working on schoolwork. I just feel so pressured by my parents to be the best in school so I can have a good job when I’m older. As much as I complain about them, they still get in my head. Honestly? They scare me. I wish I didn’t prioritize schoolwork so much. I wish I could articulate my feelings better. I never really learned how. I think… I think that’s why I was so drawn to you. I know you don’t think so, but you’re really good at showing your emotions. Sometimes too good,” he laughed. “What I’m trying to say is that I like you, Grantaire. I do. And I have for a while. I honestly don’t know how long. And I get it if you still don’t want to talk to me. I shouldn’t have shouted. I shouldn’t have pressured you. Believe me, I know how it feels,” he tried to laugh again but it just came out as a sob. I turned around slowly.   
He was crying. I never thought I would see the great Enjolras cry. But, here we were, in the cold, dark night, lit only with the streetlights and various dorm rooms still studying or doing god-knows-what late into the night.   
I was frozen. I didn’t know what to do… How was I supposed to handle a crying Enjolras? I had him on such a pedestal and all in one swift motion, with just four words, he had knocked it down. “I like you, Grantaire.” He said that. Exactly that. I had never believed he would say those words. Oh, I’d dreamed of it, sure. But I never thought he’d say them for real. And I definitely didn’t think it’d be like this.  
I don’t really remember much of what happened next. I kind of… went numb. I remember walking up to him, lightly touching his shoulder, then he fell into me. We hugged for a really long time. It seemed like forever. We both cried, I remember that. Then nothing until I woke up back in my dorm room, our limbs were tangled on my bed, Enjolras asleep. His eyes were still red. So were my cheeks. I fell asleep too. 

I woke up the next morning groggy and sore. I opened my eyes to messy blonde hair and I was startled for a second before suddenly remembered. It started slowly at first, remembering the walk, the conversation leading up to it, then all at once I remembered the shouting. The feeling in my gut that made it feel like I’d just lost everyone I loved. I remembered walking away. I remembered Enjolras’s confession. The hug, the walk home, Enjolras falling asleep in my bed, smiling faintly despite having cried his eyes out just minutes earlier. I remembered….  
I remembered I had an exam this morning.   
Shit.  
“Apollo,” I whispered, nudging Enjolras. He grunted and buried his face farther into the pillow. I smiled. “I never thought you’d be so grumpy, Apollo,” I said, a little louder. He laughed into the pillow. “I have a comp exam, love, will you let me leave?” I said. I really wasn’t planning on saying “love” but it came out of my mouth before I could stop it. He blushed but pulled his face out of the pillow. I smiled pleadingly. “Hmmm can’t you just skip it?” he mumbled, smiling. “You of all people should not be encouraging me to skip an exam,” I laughed. “It’s just one lousy exam,” he protested, but let me go anyway. I noticed we both just fell asleep in our clothes. I didn’t change. I did my hair, washed my face, and turned back to Enjolras. “So, what? Are you just going to stay in here all day? Snoop through my things? I must warn you, I am utterly uninteresting in whatever I have here,” I said, smirking at a very disheveled Enjolras, sprawled over the comforter on my bed. Thank god I got lucky and didn’t have to share the room with anyone. He laughed, “No, I actually have a couple classes later. Do you mind if I use your bathroom and stuff, though?” I don’t think it had fully set in that Enjolras was literally in my bed. We slept together. Well, not like that.. but you know. Technically. “Yeah,” I replied with minimal stuttering. “Of course that’s fine. It’s not like it’s the first time you’ve been in here, Enj,” I said in one breath. I ran my hand through my hair and breathed out. I really had to get going. I kneeled at the front of my bed and looked at Enjolras’s face. God, he was gorgeous even with terribly messy hair and tired eyes. “I need to go now, ‘Pollo,” I smiled. “Grantaire-“ he started, and I don’t know what Gryffindor spirit possessed my Hufflepuff ass in that moment, but I leaned forward and kissed him. Softly, on the lips, but still pushing forward. I put my hand on the back of his neck. I think I surprised him, but he kissed me back and I could feel his smile. After a bit I pulled away and stood up, scratching the back of my neck nervously. “Bye, Enjolras. I’ll see you later.”  
He was smiling so wide. That made me smile wide too. “Bye, ‘Taire.”

**Author's Note:**

> This was going to be short but idk what happened. sorry if it seems rushed by the end! i needed to stop it while it was still good lmao. 
> 
> i hope you like it!!!! 💕


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